🎶 2022-03-12 10:30:00 - Paris/France.
I-Kae Tempest ithe ngcu etafileni ngaphandle kwesitishi, idlala ngecuba. UMurphy, i-Tempest's Alaskan Malamute, uyangcangcazela njengoko ndisondela kwaye, endibeka ixesha, u-Tempest ubeka icuba – lingekalayitiwe – epokothweni yakhe yasesifubeni. Kangangeminyaka, i-Tempest's curly barnet yayiluphawu olubonakalayo. Namhlanje, nangona kunjalo, benxibe iiteki ezimhlophe, ijean esongiweyo kunye nebhatyi ye-turquoise, iinwele zabo zigcinwa zinqunyulwe, i-fade ecocekileyo abathi ngamanye amaxesha bazibambe beyincoma, utshilo u-Tempest.
Sidibana kuhambo-hambo eCatford, kumzantsi-mpuma weLondon, ngesicelo seSiphepho; ikona yekomkhulu abalibiza ngokuba likhaya kwasebuntwaneni. Imbongi echumileyo, umbhali kunye negcisa, iSivunguvungu sichithe eyona nxalenye ingcono yeshumi leminyaka sihambahamba kwihlabathi, kodwa kukho into ebisoloko ibabuyisela apha. « Abantu bayandibuza ukuba kwakutheni ukuze ndihlale apho,” batsho. “Kungenxa yokuba ndiziva ndisondele kakhulu kule ndawo kunye nabantu endibaziyo ubomi bam bonke apha. Uqhwithela, ngoku oneminyaka engama-36, akazange azive efuna ukubaleka.
Sihamba ithutyana, ngaphambi kokuba sizinze kwisitulo esizolileyo ngasemlanjeni. Sekusekupheleni kukaJanuwari – kubanda kakhulu. U-Tempest ubalisa indlela, kwiminyaka yabo yokuqala, ulwimi kunye namazwi abancede bajonga ihlabathi-indlela into eyacofa ngayo xa beqala ukudlwengula phakathi kwabahlobo beselula. Badlule kwizigaba ezahlukeneyo, bethatha imakrofoni ngalo lonke ixesha amathuba avelayo. Kwakukho amaqela e-squat kunye neminyhadala yeehippie; EMonti kumnandi.
“Ndandidla ngokusebenza kwivenkile yokurekhoda, yaye ndandidla ngokuphuma ndiye kuma kwisitrato esikhulu ukuze ndicule abantwana abadidekileyo kwisikhululo sebhasi. Kwiminyaka yakhe yokuqala yamashumi amabini, i-Tempest yafumana indawo yegama elithethiweyo. Kungekudala ubhukisho lwaqala ukungena, njengoko kwenza isithembiso sokubhala sethiyetha. “Kulapho ndeva khona ezi ndlela zivuleka engqondweni yam,” utshilo uTempest. “Yayingeyiyo nje i-16-bar rap, yayiyingxelo: iploti, isakhiwo, imixholo. Ndandiyiva ingqondo yam itshintsha.
Fihla kwaye ufune… Uqhwithela luthathe phantse iminyaka emibini ukuthetha ngesigqibo saso sokuphuma njengento engeyoyamthetho. Ukufota: Wolfgang Tillmans
Uqhwithela unamandla achwayitisayo njengoko ebalisa yonke iprojekthi enomdla kunye nomsebenzi. Kodwa xa kufikwa ekuxoxeni ngemicimbi yobuqu ngakumbi ngexesha lodliwano-ndlebe lwethu, baye bahlukana-inkangeleko ezininzi zokucinga.
Ngo-Agasti ka-2020, kwiposti ye-Instagram, iSivunguvungu saphuma singesosesibini. Bavakalisa ukuba igama labo ngoku lalinguKae (elibizwa njengonobumba K) baza bacacisa ukuba kwixesha elizayo baza kusebenzisa izimelabizo. Babhala ngelo xesha: “Ndazama ukuba yiloo nto ndandicinga ukuba abanye babefuna ndibe yiyo ukuze ndingazibeki esichengeni sokulahlwa. Oku kuzifihla kwam kukhokhelele kuzo zonke iintlobo zobunzima ebomini bam. Kwaye linyathelo lokuqala elikhokelela kulwazi olungcono kunye nentlonipho engcono yam. Ngaphaya kwaloo ngxelo, nangona kunjalo, namhlanje lelinye lamaxesha okuqala ukuba bathethe esidlangalaleni ngamava abo.
“Imveliso ibe nkulu,” utshilo uTempest, eneentloni. “Into entle kodwa enzima ukuyenza esidlangalaleni. Le nkqubo yayizele yimigibe nokungaqiniseki. "Kunzima ngokwaneleyo ukuthi, 'Heyi, jonga, ngaba ndidlulile okanye ndingeyo-binary,' kubantu obathandayo. Kwaye ndinobomi obungamawele ngaphaya kwezihlobo kunye nosapho lwam.
Andiqondi ukuba imizimba yethu yaba ngummandla wemfazwe
“Abantu beTrans banothando kakhulu, bahle kakhulu,” batsho. “Ndicinga ngendawo endihlala kuyo namandla endinawo kubantu abandixelela ukuba akuyomfuneko ukuba ndihambe ndedwa kule nto. Isaqhwithi siyawava amandla okubonakala. Ukuba ndiyazifihla kwaye ndibe neentloni ngesiqu sam, [njengokungathi] ndinentloni ngabo.
Isaqhwithi sikumhlaba oqinileyo kwaye uzibonakalisa ngomsebenzi wakhe, kwaye umnikelo wakhe wamva nje unjalo. Kwinyanga ezayo siza kubona ukukhutshwa kwecwecwe labo lesine, Umgca Ligobile. Iialbham zabo ezimbini zokuqala zifumene amaBhaso eMercury. U-Tempest sele ebhale imidlalo emithathu, inoveli kunye neencwadi ezintandathu zemibongo kwaye kunyaka ophelileyo wapapasha i-On Connection, eyokuqala yabo engeyonyani. "Kodwa iyaqala ukundibetha ukuba yahluke kangakanani le albhamu kuzo zonke ezinye," batsho, "ukuba inokuthi ihambe kangakanani." Kukuzuza into engaphaya koko bebekuko abanye.
Ngomculo, iLine Is a Curve ngokuqinisekileyo ngumcimbi wokuzicingela kunye nowobuqu ngakumbi kunale ingasentla; Nangona kunjalo, amazwi engoma yeSivunguvungu kunye namandla okusebenza ahlala engaguquguquki. Iqhekeza ngalinye lingena nzulu: “Ndiziva ndivuleka… Ndiyekile ukuba nethemba, ndifunda ukuthemba; mandinike uthando, ndamkele uthando kwaye ndingabi nto ngaphandle kothando.
Okokuqala kwiminyaka esibhozo, ubuso beSivunguvungu bukwabhalwa kumzobo. Bathi, luphawu lokufuna ukumema abaphulaphuli, ngendlela ebibonakala inzima ngaphambili. Uqhwithela uchithe iminyaka ujonge indawo yokujonga kwaye ungakhululekanga kakhulu ngaphakathi.
Zichetywe kwakhona… Iinwele zenkangeleko entsha yeNkanyamba. Ukufota: Wolfgang Tillmans
“Kwiirekhodi ezimbini zokugqibela,” batsho, “bendifuna ukunyamalala ngokupheleleyo kwimiba engaphambili yoshishino. Kwakukho umnqweno wokwenene wokuvumela umsebenzi uthethe ngokwawo; ukuhlala bezamana nento yokuba njengombhali imveliso yabo yanele, kodwa ukukhulula umculo kuthetha ukuba phambi koluntu. Kodwa ngoku, ndifuna ukwahluka. »
Oku akuthethi ukuba uhlengahlengiso lulula. “Kunzima ukuthetha nawe,” wavuma watsho uTempest. “Kuba ndiyazi ukuba kuhamba njani. Kuya kwenzeka ntoni emva koko. Abantu beTrans basetyenziswa ngezi ndlela zingaqhelekanga zokuvakalisa uloyiko olunzulu lwabantu malunga nezinye izinto; ukucinga ngabantu abangenabuntu…” Amehlo afumile, iintlungu zabo ziyavakala. “Andiyiqondi indlela umzimba wam, imizimba yethu, ibe ngummandla wemfazwe. Le mizimba besihlala kuyo ubomi bethu bonke.
U<em>Tempest uthi: “Ndiyekile, kodwa ngaba awunangxaki xa nditshaya? Baphume balayite elicuba.
Kwiiveki ezimbini emva koko, ndihleli ngaphaya kweSivunguvungu kunye noMurphy kwakhona, ngeli xesha kwindawo yokurekhoda esemazantsi eLondon. Kwiintsuku ezimbalwa ngaphambilana, babethumele umyalezo becebisa enye intlanganiso. “Ndandimathidala ukuthetha ngam ukugqibela kwethu ukudibana,” batsho becotha. Kukho ubuthathaka kwilizwi labo. “Ndivakalelwa kukuba kufuneka ndilumke. Ndingumbalisi wamabali: Ndiyawazi amandla amabali. Ngomsebenzi wabo, ewe, iSivunguvungu sabelana ngezifinyezo zobomi babo. Kodwa isihobe kunye neprozi zinokuzifihla iinkcukacha; ubugcisa bunokubakho kwi-abstract.
“Eli cwecwe lilonke, le nkqubo, kunye nokukhululwa kwam, kukujongana nombono wokuba yintoni imvumi,” batsho, “kwaye kwahluke njani oko ekubeni ngumbhali wemidlalo yeqonga okanye umbhali, apho unokungabonakali kancinci. Inxalenye yeNkanyamba ilangazelela oko kungabonakali. Kwangaxeshanye, yintoni endiyoyikayo? Bubomi nam. Mhlawumbi, bathi, ukuvuleka kunokuphilisa. “Intlungu yento ebiyiyo-udliwano-ndlebe okanye kumabonakude, loo ntlungu ikwamalunga [nesini] dysphoria,” batsho. "Kwaye ngenxa yokuba ndenza into yokuyiqhuba, mhlawumbi ayiyi kuba buhlungu ngeli xesha." »
“Andithethi nto iphosakeleyo kubantu bam,” bongeza ngelithi. Uqhwithela uziva enyanzelekile. “Xa imiba eguquguqukayo kuthethwa ngayo kumaphephandaba, kaninzi ayingobantu abathetha izinto ezidlulayo. Ke ngalo mzuzu unqabileyo kukho umntu othetha ngezinto ezidlulayo, andifuni kukruqula okanye ukuchitha ithuba.
Ndandohluke kakhulu yabethusa abantu: ungubani wena? Uyintoni? Ngokufanelekileyo, andizange ndifune ukudlula enye okanye enye isondo
Bathatha umzuzu. Ukwabelana ngamabali abo adlulileyo, utsho uTempest, akukho lula. Bathi: “Ndandiphila njengenkwenkwe de ndafikisa. "Abantu abandingqongileyo babefana, 'Uyi-tomboy, uya kuphila.' Ndiyifake ngaphakathi loo nto kwaye ndiyathemba ukuba ndiya kwenza njalo. Ayizange yenzeke loo nto. “Ukufikisa kwakukhathaza. Kwandizisela iintlungu ezininzi. »
Oko bakubeka kwiphepha akuzange kwabelwane ngako, kodwa nalapho iSivunguvungu safumana intuthuzelo kumagama nolwimi. Kwaye phakathi koontanga babo, ubukhulu becala abafana abathe ngqo kunye ne-cisgender, i-Tempest yamkelwa ngothando kwaye akukho mibuzo ibuzwayo. Akhonto yokutsho. "Ndandingomnye wabafana", bathi: le mvakalelo yokwaziwa, esinye sezizathu zokuba abazange bafune ukushiya lo luntu. Kodwa xa ndadibana nomntu omtsha, kwafuneka ndiqale phantsi. Uninzi lwabantwana abadlulayo badlula kule nto. Kwaye ndandingenalo uluntu olunobugxwayiba, okanye amazwi okuchaza, ngoko ke ndandisoloko ndizifihla.
Ngasekupheleni kweminyaka yama-80s kunye nasekuqaleni kweminyaka yoo-90, bekukho ukuqonda kunye nenkxaso enganeno kubantwana abadlulayo nabangengabo ababhinary. Izaqhwithi zazamazama. “Ndandine-ADHD, ukudakumba, ukuphazamiseka koloyiko kunye nedysphoria. Bendinobunzima obukhona nengqondo yam kulomzimba. Bayeka ukuya esikolweni, endaweni yoko bathatha ii-GCSEs kwicandelo lokukhokela abafundi. “Ndandisele utywala kakhulu, ndisebenzisa iziyobisi kakhulu. Ndakhe ndangabikho ekhaya ixeshana. Isaqhwithi siyanda koku kuQhagamshelwano: ubusuku obuchithwe silele emangcwabeni nomhlobo osenyongweni owayelikhoboka leheroin; ukuchukunyiswa yindoda endala ngokutshintshiselana ngebhiya necuba. Iintloni ababenazo ngesini sabo, utsho uTempest, zazibadla.
“Yonke le nto ndiyithethayo xa ndandigxininise kumculo weengoma, i-rap kunye nomculo,” baqhubeka befumana i-flow, "yayisindisi sobomi sokwenyani. I-balm yentlungu xa ndididekile kwaye ndigula. Yonke imihla, i-dysphoria yayingumthombo wonxunguphalo olukhulu. “Ngenxa yokuba ndandohluke kakhulu kwabanye, ibiya kubothusa: ungubani? Uyintoni? Abantu babengandiqondi. Xa ndibaleka, yayilipasi lam elo. Bendingadingi kupasa nakwesiphi isini.
Isaqhwithi kwiNational Theatre rehearsals yeParadesi. Ukufota: uHelen Murray
Umculo wawungekokubalekela iNkanyamba, wawususa ingqwalasela yabantu emizimbeni yabo. "Xa ndandine-rap kunye neengoma," u-Tempest uthi, " lo Ndandiyintoni. Yonke enye into inyamalele. Ndaphantse ndawushiya ngasemva umzimba wam ndaza ndaba ligcisa.
Babezimisele ukuphumelela njengabadlali. Kodwa ukubonwa kangaka kweza nemingeni yako. Ngequbuliso baba "nguye" kunye "naye" kumaphephandaba; uchongwe kwelona nqanaba libalaseleyo labasetyhini. Udliwano-ndlebe lusenokubonakala luyingozi. Ayisiyiyo into yokuba i-dysphoria yakhe yahamba, kodwa ngawo onke amehlo kubo, iSivunguvungu sasingazi ukuba singayilungisa njani.
Bathi: “Ndandikufuna ngamandla ukuphumelela, ndandikufuna ngokwenene ukuphumelela. So andayihoya ndaqhubeka. Ixesha elide, i-dysphoria yam yayifihliwe kum. Iminyaka eyi-10 iyanditya. Ukukhula kokungakhululeki: uya kuyenza nini into?
Uqhwithela uphuphe echeba iinwele zakhe. Bathi: “Ndandiyinqwenela gqitha kangangokuba ngalo lonke ixesha ndibona umntu oneenwele ezimfutshane okanye echetywe ngokutsha, ndandiba buhlungu emzimbeni. Kangangeminyaka, iNkanyamba yayiziva ivaleleke kwizitshixo zazo ezinde: uyabathanda abantu wathi ukusika ezo curls zinde kuya kuba sisityholo. Yaba ngumfuziselo: ikhaka apho iNkanyamba yazimela, ewe, kodwa imele ukungazinzi kwabo okugqugqisileyo ngokulindelekileyo kobufazi. Bathi: “Ndaziqinisekisa ukuba andinakuze ndibeke esichengeni sokuwusika. "Ndandifana, 'Ukuba ndiyayenza le nto, ngaba ndingakwazi ukungena eqongeni? Abantu baya kuyeka ukuphulaphula. Iyaphambana into eyenziwa yidysphoria kuwe.
"Ndayeka ukuphila ubomi endandikubo", bathi, "kwaye mhlawumbi ndineminyaka engama-50, xa ndayeka lo msebenzi, ndacinga ukuba ekugqibeleni ndingalwenza utshintsho. Kodwa ngakumbi nangakumbi, andizange ndikwazi ukunyamezela. NgoJanuwari 2020, bacheba iinwele zabo zibe mfutshane. Amehlo abo aqaqambile xa evuselela imvakalelo yenkululeko. Kwaye ke ubhubhane wabetha. Okokuqala ngqa kwinto evakala ngathi...
SOURCE: Uphonononga Iindaba
Ungalibazisi ukwabelana ngenqaku lethu kwiinethiwekhi zentlalo ukusinika ukomelela okuqinileyo. 🧐